As though the natural, zen-like wooded environment weren’t enough, weight-loss surgery patients found themselves in a serene setting to share successes, offer support to one another, and discover some interpersonal insight to their ongoing journey with weight loss. St. Joseph’s Center for Weight Management’s Weekend in the Pines retreat was a chance for quiet breakthroughs, reflection, and a chance to ask questions.

Hereʼs to you!

During the opening success walk, complete with personal stories and “before and after” photos, all were applauded for their achievements. Being able to zip a jacket, the crossing of legs while sitting, or riding comfortably in an airplane seat without fear of being called out by the flight crew, were stories shared (some with tears). Many in the room nodded their heads as they related to the transformation they made because of their choice to seek help at The Center for Weight Management. As they lost the weight, patients said they learned a thing or two about self-love and inner strength. “I wouldn’t be alive today if I hadn’t talked to Leah (Walters),” one confessed. (Walters is the center’s bariatric services coordinator.)

It ainʼt easy

When sitting with a group of surgical weight-loss patients it isn’t long before the inevitable topic of protein surfaces. Even when groups broke out into firelight sessions it was clearly on the priority of things to talk about. Interestingly, this is the first Weekend in the Pines in which people with adjustable bands met to share notes. They talked about physical struggles and about what they can and can’t eat. They know that their choice to go with the silicone banding means they will need greater discipline since they can still eat sweets and don’t “get” to experience the dumping syndrome associated with gastric bypass surgery. “It’s not an easy thing; it’s tougher, it’s harder,” one confessed. Still, her resolve was firm. “I don’t want to go back and be that person anymore.” The understanding remains clear. The adjustable band is merely a tool to get to the goal of maintained weight loss. Realistic self-appraisal of your new body helps when you are stuck in your old, former ways of thinking

Your body changes, your brain may not

So you’re in your new body. You’re at the shopping mall, and anxiety takes over. You’re afraid you’re not going to be able to walk back to the car. At one time that may have been true (at least in your memory’s eye when you were morbidly obese), but now that you’ve reached goal weight, why is your brain still wired to that old way of thinking? Many say they lost the weight but still “feel fat.” The Center for Weight Management’s “dream team” consisting of a pharmacist, registered dietitian, assistant, physician assistant, and psychologist addresses this repeated question. Joel Kirchner, PhD, suggests to stop and address any anxiety or fear-driven emotion by challenging the issue rather than avoid- ing it. Changing your thoughts or feelings can take time and is an ongoing process. “You have to change the behavior,” he points out. It can take work, but eventually it’s possible to “see” the person you know is there. Support groups can also help. In fact, the more support you get, the more likely one is to sustain those changes. The Center for Weight Management has resources available through programs, per- sonnel, and recommended online sites to help with these and other issues. “There is no Lap-Band for the brain,” says Karen Mayer Cunningham, guest speaker and humorist. “There is no bypass for the brain. You have to like you.” The topic of divorce rates also came up and it was noted that the divorce rate for weight-loss surgery patients is at about 80 percent compared to 50 percent for the general population. Dynamics that can occur during a person’s transformation can be significant. Pre-counseling and education can prepare couples for the changes and possible stresses that may happen throughout the weight-loss process. Joel Kirchner, PhD, held small- group discussions for retreat participants dealing with depression. While the issue is very complex, he says it’s important to “elicit support” and work to manage the condition. Avoiding isolation is also key. The Smoky Hills Retreat and Conference Center near Osage made the perfect setting for a morning walk in the woods.